After Clocking Out and a Customer Tries to Ask For Shit
Let’s talk about my shift tonight
ACTUALLY LETS DON’T BECAUSE ITS 4:30 IN THE FUCKING MORNING AND I’M EXHAUSTED.
A bunch of bros walk up to the bar on a busy Friday night and the first one orders a fucking mojito.
Then his friend goes, “Dude what rhymes with mojito?!”
And the rest yell, “BROOOOOJITOOO”
Get. the fuck. out of my bar.
The lights are turned off for God’s sake
If I say to you “Hey guys it’s time to go, we’re closing the building”
Don’t respond with “Oh, the building is closed?”
What did I literally just say to you
Fried Green Tomatoes.
The kitchen fucks up and makes tickets twice sometimes. So when they make an appetizer we don’t need, they get us to try and give it away to customers at the bar.
So I offered this couple a mess-up fried green tomato app. Who is really gonna turn down free shit right? I fucking wouldn’t.
I come back a little later to get empty plates and the woman goes “I have to be honest, I didn’t really care for those.”
Uh, okay? Well you didn’t pay for them, did you bitch?
She then goes on to explain to me how she’s used to the way her mother makes them. “Really thin and crispy. They’re just delicious.”
First of all - you’re being insulting. You just got some free damn food and I’m back here starving to death.
Second of all - why do you think I care about how your mom makes fried green tomatoes? Do you think we’re going to stop everything and start making shit the way your mom does?
And third - nobody wants no flimsy ass fried tomatoes. Give me that shit thick and juicy - if I want a fucking chip, I’ll go get a fucking chip. God almighty.